I did the same with mine – prepared for the worst, but pleasantly surprised:

WHAT IS THE FILTER PAPER MADE OF THAT YOU USE IN YOUR TEA BAGS?

The filter paper used for Yamamotoyama tea bags is made from 100% cellulose fibers (wood). Test results conclude that chlorine dioxide is not present in our tea bag filter paper. The filter paper is not coated with the compound epichlorohydrin, and does not contain any free epichlorohydrin. Yamamotoyama tea bag filter paper is machine folded and pressed, therefore no glue is needed or used. Our teabags are completely compostable.

I was known to yank a power chord or two back in college…

A fellow opposum!

Crock pot stew is barely any effort too

I dug in (thanks for linking sources) and there are some promising details. The ~80% figure for the US is from a 2011 report (even though the citation states 2014…), so it’s very old. In 2019, the US began an initiative to increase awareness of this issue and address it, see the progress here (pdf link).

Not trying to counter the narrative, but at least we’re talking about it on the federal level, so maybe that can provide some optimism to people.