There are other janitor jobs out there, I’m sure.

Crimea was an inside job!

But, you see, Biden was somehow maybe going to genocide or something despite not being on the ballot.

It runs on some sort of electricity.

I stepped on my hamster which not only ruined Christmas but led to my parents eventually breaking up. It wasn’t a deliberate stepping, of course. Nibbles, bless his tiny, furry heart, had a habit of darting underfoot, a furry landmine in the living room. This year, he chose the precise moment Aunt Carol was launching into her annual monologue about her “special” sauce – a concoction that looked suspiciously like regurgitated beets – to stage his daring escape. My foot connected with his minuscule form with a sickening crunch, a sound that echoed through the suddenly silent room, louder than any Christmas carol.

Aunt Carol, mid-sentence, froze, her face a mask of horrified fascination. Nibbles, sadly, was no more. A tiny, crimson stain bloomed on the Persian rug, resembling nothing so much as a particularly abstract Christmas ornament. My mother, a woman whose love for small, furry creatures bordered on the obsessive, let out a wail that could shatter glass. My dad, ever the pragmatist, muttered something about “collateral damage” and reached for the brandy. The air, thick with the scent of pine needles and impending doom, crackled with unspoken accusations. It was a Christmas tableau worthy of a Hieronymus Bosch painting.

In the ensuing chaos, as people scrambled to salvage what remained of the Christmas dinner, Dad, still clutching a corner of the tablecloth, lost his balance. He stumbled, tripped over my outstretched leg (I swear, it was an accident!), and fell. And, in a move that defied all logic and physics, he somehow managed to grab my leg on the way down.

The last thing I saw before the world dissolved into a blur of pain and panicked shouts was my father, sprawled on the floor amidst the wreckage of Christmas dinner, holding my leg like a prized Christmas roast. “Gotcha!” he yelled triumphantly, while pulling my leg. Just like I’m pulling your leg now.

idspispopd

Well, you are, but not as cynical as ticketmaster who might have done exactly that.

Certainly true for the US.

trump can’t even point to SA on a map.

Anders Vistisen is a moron and belongs to one of the most populistic Danish parties and he normally does not speak for Denmark in general.

He’s right about this though. Orange shit stain can fuck right off.

Sow chaos. It’s what russia does.

You don’t have to hold your breath during the underwater stuff. It’s not a video game.

history | grep whatever is quite useful when you just barely remember a command or the files you used it on.

If Georgia isn’t a democracy then I guess they aren’t really welcome in the EU anyway, so that kind of solves itself.

Even the Ferengi understood that peace is also good for business.

Maybe you can find inspiration in The Book of Wondrous Inventions.

“A 45 year old not wearing a costume and strung out on Ketamine” OR a kid in the greatest costume ever?

Getting butthurt and personal over an offhand remark in a humour community is really toxic and you should probably work on that.

I trust that you can be better, my good buddy ❤

That wouldn’t fly during a code review.

You recommend using AI to produce code you don’t understand?