I missed a really important appointment earlier and I even kind of want to still be in a bad mood about it because I’m so irritated with myself but now I’m too distracted by the rest of the shit going on in my life to spend any energy staying grumpy

  • kindnesskills@literature.cafeEnglish
    5·
    2 days ago

    I get this for sure… getting annoyed at not being annoyed enough. Two questions I workshopped with my then therapist for similar situations:

    1. What do I want/hope/expect staying in this mood/feeling to accomplish?
    2. If this is something worthwhile (helpful, not harmful), how can I accomplish it without clinging to the feeling?

    Like for example missing an appointment, I expect being annoyed at myself or in a bad mood to punish me into re-booking the appointment or not miss it the next time. I can accomplish this without the punishment-part by re-booking it Right Now (including sending an email or leaving a voice mail asking them to get back to me if they’re unavailable), and mark the next appointment time in my calendar+alarm system for 7 minutes earlier before I need to leave so I have time to find my keys, pee, and go back in for my phone.

    Bonus question:

    1. This mood of mine, who is it affecting aside from myself? Is it worth punishing the people around me at the same time, for my mistake?