• fizzle@quokk.au
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    12 hours ago

    I don’t begrudge anyone not wanting kids. It’s not for everyone.

    That said, my first thought when I saw the post title was “I don’t regret having kids”.

    I suppose the caveat is that my twins are only 2 and a half, I may well regret having kids when they start getting pregnant, selling drugs, marrying chat bots, that sort of thing.

    Edit: I just scrolled through some of the other comments and noticed that the majority of them say that they don’t regret not having kids. The fediverse is pretty homogenous I guess.

    • kindnesskills@literature.cafe
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      11 hours ago

      Were you told you would regret having your kids? That’s wild.

      It’s a lot more common for people to be told that they will regret not having kids, than being told they’ll regret having them… so I think the similarities in the responses is quite natural, dont you? Not a lot of parents can answer this post with their kids in mind, but pretty much every voluntarily childless person can.

      • fizzle@quokk.au
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        11 hours ago

        It’s a lot more common for people to be told that they will regret not having kids, than being told they’ll regret having them

        That’s not my experience, at all.

        When I was in my 20s plenty of older guys would tell me not to have kids. Admittedly, these were the older weirdos hanging out at bars, but the source of the advice isn’t really in question right now.

        • kindnesskills@literature.cafe
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          10 hours ago

          Every single voluntarily childless person I’ve spoken to have had the experience of being told they’ll regret it.

          I can only recall two people being told they’d regret their decision to have kids… and they were both teenagers, so even though I don’t agree with saying something like that, I can understand the sentiment of wanting them to wait a few years.

          Seems we life in very different worlds.

      • Velma@lemmy.today
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        11 hours ago

        I’ve certainly heard the sentiment from childfree people before. My late BIL used to call kids “demon spawn” and “crotch fruit” and loudly proclaim he would never have children because they’re such a drain physically and financially.

        There’s assholes everywhere unfortunately. I know childfree people frequently get pushed to have kids as well.

        • kindnesskills@literature.cafe
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          11 hours ago

          It’s just so rude to say someone will regret their choice regarding kids… BIL is free to make that choice for himself, and more than welcome to keep his mouth shut on your choice.

          • Velma@lemmy.today
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            11 hours ago

            Yeah any commentary around pregnancy or children should just be positive for what that person has chosen for their life. Having or not having children is so subjective and can be a painful subject for some. Better to be kind and not pushy imo

    • Velma@lemmy.today
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      11 hours ago

      Mine is older now and some parts of parenting are harder, but I still don’t regret having a kid.

      Having a kid actually reinforced my belief that only people who really want kids should have kids.

      • fizzle@quokk.au
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        11 hours ago

        In my own case, it’s certainly been one of my life’s great adventures. The most meaningful thing I’ve ever done.