MJ calls what happened to her in Zion national park “small ‘T’ trauma”. She knows women have experienced worse from their partners. But she still feels the anger of being left behind on a hike by her now ex. “It brings up stuff in my body that maybe I have not cleared out yet,” she said.
Five years ago, MJ and a new partner – he was not exactly her boyfriend, and the pair were not exclusive – traveled from Los Angeles to Utah for an adventure getaway. MJ, who is 38 and works in PR, was looking forward to exploring Zion’s striking scenery; its vast sandstone canyon and pristine wading trails were on the list. But on the morning of their big hike, MJ was not feeling well. She could not shake the feeling that something was “off”; indeed, MJ would learn on this trip that her partner was seeing other women.
As they made their way up Angel’s Landing, MJ’s partner started walking faster than her. “I could tell it was getting on his nerves that I was slow,” she said. “I was like, ‘Fuck it, just go ahead of me.’” He did without hesitation.
When she caught up at the top of the mountain, they took a picture together. Then her partner hiked down the mountain with a woman he had met on the way up, leaving MJ to finish by herself. They broke up shortly after that trip. (MJ asked to be referred to by her initials for the sake of speaking openly about a past relationship.)
Last month, MJ opened TikTok and heard the phrase “alpine divorce”, a label she now attaches to her experience in Zion.
Remind me never to get on an airplane or train.
Buses questionable.
When you get on a plane, they do a whole safety announcement, pointing out the exits. Trains and busses have legally mandated labeling for exits. You are well informed how to get out on your own.
Yeah for planes I’m not worried about how to use the door, I’m worried about how I get from 20 000+ feet to ground level, safely.
For trains and buses it’d be more about hiking out from the middle of nowhere.
Either case I’m not actually worried, just saying that the logic of “trust no one but yourself” is flawed.
It’s less about trusting no one and more about recognizing that something could happen to the person you are with, like a medical emergency for example, and that you should be able to survive on your own. Say you are hiking with someone and they fall and break their leg. Do you both just lay there and die? You need to be able to get yourself back to safety and to get help.